"fo shizzle mah nizzle"
Have you ever notice that whenever a rapper releases a song that makes it to the top ten, a new phrase floats around that just drives you out of your mind? Fo shizzle mah nizzle is one of them. Come on, fo shizzle means something, and it means something consistently, but fo shizzle mah nizzle just doesn't have a consistent definition. I alone in the 2 or 3 places I go everyday have heard it used in at least half a dozen different ways, so I can't imagine how many different meanings there are for it.
This is the definition of it from urban dictionary. It got 125 thumbs up out of 128 votes.
"fo shizzle mah nizzle" is a bastardization of "fo' sheezy mah neezy" which is a bastardization of "for sure mah nigga" which is a bastardization of "I concur with you whole heartedly my African American brother"
"brrrrrrrat"
I'm not going to say much about this one because I don't want to be tracked down and beaten in a back alley but, this is just plain stupid. It doesn't even sound like an uzi.
"Maybe or maybe not"
Ever hear someone say "that may or may not be the case," as if there's some hidden third possibility that we weren't aware of? Thanks for pointing out the only two possibilities in the universe. These are the worst kind of people to talk to because they try so hard to be open-minded that it sounds like the debate in a political science class where no opinion is too stupid for the professor to consider and the same fat kid keeps raising his hand to tell you his dumb ideas about free market capitalism as you fantasize about repeatedly stomping his face into a jar. I hate talking to open-minded people. They're the same kind of people who emphasize every other word when they type as if you can somehow hear their obnoxious cadence in your head, for example: "we didn't go to the store, but we DID buy a cake." Cool it Shatner, we don't read in the same voice you speak.
"Well that's just your opinion"
This one pisses me off just thinking about it. If you slit my throat right now you'd get shot in the eye with boiling blood. Any time you say something sucks around someone who disagrees, they try to validate their taste in music/movies/clothing by reminding you that you still only speak for yourself, as if their opinions are in jeopardy of being monopolized by your own. Everyone already knows it's my opinion by virtue of the fact that I said it, no need to restate the obvious you dope.
"It takes one to know one"
Ever call someone a bitch only to be countered with the bullet-proof come back: "well it takes one to know one"? You're basically saying "yes, I spread my legs for money, as do you." Good job Ms. Rotten-crotch, you've rebuked nothing. What difference does it make if the person calling you a bitch is one as well? You're still a skanky bitch who charges money for hand-jobs and why the hell are you charging for a hand-job anyway? Unless all your clients are paralyzed, any prostitute caught charging someone for a hand-job should be sued for extortion. That's another reason prostitution should be legal: you can't really sue a prostitute for extortion if prostitution is illegal now can you wise ass?
"I'm a child at heart"
Yeah, you're a child at heart, just as soon as children start going to work every day to rot in a cubicle for a meager pay check so they can drink their troubles away in a bar for the rest of their lives. Unless you're an astronaut, secret agent, vampire hunter, or all three, you're probably a sellout; screw you. Nobody wanted to be a regional director of sales or an investment banker when they were kids. On top of that, nobody thinks you're cute or funny by stating you're a "child at heart" on your stupid online profile that you created because you're a boring middle-aged loser with sagging tits and yellow nails who survives off greasy TV dinners every night as you contemplate the exact moment your life became so miserable. But hey, don't take my word for it. After all, passing by "Cartoon Network" as you're flipping through channels technically makes you a "child at heart." Either that or the world's oldest virgin.
"Sorry, but (also known as "No offense, but")"
Girls usually say this when they think they're being clever: "sorry, but you're a moron." It's a phrase derived from the expression people use when they're breaking some bad news to an old friend: "I'm sorry to say this, but the results are back and... you're an idiot." The only problem is, they never intend to say it with such eloquence, but rather, they use the phrase like it's a blunt object, hammering their square insult through your round psyche. If you think someone's an idiot, just come out and say it without these damn apologies you dumb hag. Unless you're a character in a fighting game, have big boobs, and just won the round with a bitch slap, saying "sorry" just before you insult someone is obnoxious, cut the bullshit.
"Strangers are just friends waiting to happen"
Yeah, either that or rape in a dark alley waiting to happen.
"Hmmmmm / Uhhhhh"
Next time you ask someone a question, look for the trademark sign of an idiot: the "hmmmmm" noise they make while they're thinking. It's especially noticeable when you go to a restaurant and the waitress asks what you want to drink; there's always some fickle fingered ass hole thumbing through the menu, sounding off like a moron with "uhhhhhh...." as if the waitress is just going to walk away without taking your order if you don't give her an audible cue that you are still breathing. These are the same type of people who repeat the question you ask them to buy time when they don't know the answer, hoping you won't notice that they're stalling. You don't need to make a sound while your five good neurons crank out the next malformed sentence from your cretaceous skull, numb nuts.
"Some of the best things in life are free"
Yeah? Well so are some of the worst, and I don't see anyone throwing a party when they get cancer.
"Less is more"
Except when it comes to money, fame, power, girls, fun, friends, and basicly just about anything you can touch.
"The grass is always greener on the other side"
If the grass is greener on the other side, then the guy with the greener grass doesn't think your grass is greener now does he? The message that this proverb is trying to stumble through is that everything always looks more attractive when you don't have it. I'm sure there are millionaires crying themselves to sleep every night because they don't live in a trailer park. Just face it: sometimes nobody envies you. There has to be a bottom and that bottom is probably you.
WHATS WITH THAT CRAP?
